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Woman sets fire to man's...yeah, that
Hey, it's not my fault that these stories keep coming (no pun)

It's like there's an epidemic of penile reports. A rash of theme, going around the Internets. And of course, I have to get them up pass them on. Here goes.

Men, a word of warning: Never sit naked in front of the TV drinking vodka.

MOSCOW (Reuters) - A woman set fire to her ex-husband's penis as he sat naked watching television and drinking vodka, Moscow police said Wednesday.

The couple was divorced. I have a feeling he'll never remarry.

The attack climaxed three years of acrimonious enforced co-habitation. The couple divorced three years ago but continued to share a small flat, something common in Russia where property costs are very high.

I did not make the climax joke. They did.

This is worse than the dwarf who got his, um, package glued to a vacuum.

Asked if the man would make a full recovery, a police spokeswoman said it was "difficult to predict."

A female officer said that. I wonder whose side she was on.

"It was monstrously painful," the wounded ex-husband told Tvoi Den newspaper. "I was burning like a torch. I don't know what I did to deserve this."

Apparently he isn't aware of his shortcomings.

Say good night, GottaLaff. Good night, GottaLaff.

* Novelty Hot Dog Roaster via Strange New Products