Since I seem to be on a penile kick, "British Dwarf's Penis Gets Stuck In Hoover"

Via Raw Story:

A dwarf performer at the Edinburgh fringe festival had to be rushed to hospital after his penis got stuck to a vacuum cleaner during an act that went horribly awry.

Oh deah. My word. That sucks. (no pun)

The main part of his act saw him appear on stage with a vacuum cleaner attached to his member through a special attachment.

The attachment broke before the performance and Blackner tried to fix it using extra-strong glue, but unfortunately only let it dry for 20 seconds instead of the 20 minutes required.

That was his first mistake. One must always allow glue to dry thoroughly before inserting one's Mr. Happy into a vacuum cleaner. What a putz. (no pun)

He then joined it directly to his organ. The end result? A solid attachment, laughter, mortification and ... hospitalisation.

Owies! That little trip must have been hard. (no pun)

"It was the most embarrassing moment of my life when I got wheeled into a packed AE with a vacuum attached to me," Blackner said.

And this is your second. The whole world knows about it now. What a weenie! (no pun)