My AMERICAblog Column:

The Week That Was 3/9/07

Another week. More preposterousness to report.

So did you hear the one about the gay porn star/prostitute/military corporal named Matt Sanchez (his nom de boink: Rod Majors) who won an award at CPAC, had his picture taken with Ann Coulter and was called "a great American" by Hannity?

Well Max did. And Matt did. And Andy did. And Joe did. And AMERICAblog did. And now we all have.

Yup, another right-wing, gay hustler beds the less-fair sex by night, only to cozy up the Party of "Faggot" by day. Where have I seen this movie before?

I wonder if during down time between speeches at CPAC they watched this cinematic gourmand in his heavily touted works of artistic panache such as Jawbreaker and Glory Hole of Fame 3?

Although, I must say, I found the latter lacked the production values of Glory Hole of Fame 2. But maybe that was just me. And you know, it's really a darn shame that John McCain's heartfelt talks on abstinence outside of marriage somehow had no effect on the very active (or was that passive?) Mr. Sanchez.

I mean you'd think a guy with the fortitude to stand up to all those lefties (none of whom have been proven to actually exist) who called him a "baby killer" and spat upon him (or was the latter a scene in his Oscar-nominated tour de force, Touched by an Anal? (seriously, don't click on this at work)) for his military service--ya know, the vast Communist conspiracy alive and well at Columbia University--could have withstood the temptation we all must one day face, to sell ourselves to anonymous, hirsute strangers for $250 a pop.

In any case, this all brings me back to something I have spoken about often in my writing. The psychological projection of a bunch of mentally-metastisized, morally-lobotomized misanthropes known as the GOP.

My favorite historian and social commentator of the 20th Century, multiple Pulitzer-Prize winning scholar Richard Hofstadter, explained the mental state of paranoid, right-wing sexual hypocrites thusly:

"The sexual freedom often atributed to him, his lack of moral inhibition, his possession of especially effective techniques for fulfilling his desires, gives exponents of the paranoid style an opportunity to project and freely express unacceptable aspects of their own minds."

If only we had enough sofas on which all these Republicans could rest so they could work out in private what they burden our politics with in public.

*For more on this and other stories, please go to cliffschecter.com. And begin to save those pennies now for the release of Cliff Schecter's first book this summer, The Real McCain.