Opposite Day
- Republicans lose all interest in perverted sex practices.
- Cheney releases emails pertinent to...well, everything.
- Cheney publicly supports gay marriage.
- Cheny comes out.
- Gonzo recalls everything.
- Gonzo leads an Impeach Bush and Cheney effort.
- Rove reveals his strategies for any and all 2008 Swiftboating.
- Rove campaigns for Dems.
- Rove calls Bush a sociopathic pinhead.
- Rove becomes Hillary's running mate.
- Ari Fleischer grows hair.
- Dems grow balls.
- Valerie and Joe Wilson win their lawsuit.
- Valerie and Joe Wilson win the lottery.
- Valerie and Joe Wilson win American Idol.
- John Boehner admits he pronounces his name "Boner".
- George H.W. Bush admits Bar is really his mother.
- George H.W. Bush admits Bar is really his father.
- Bar comes out.
- Bush tours the country, declaring that Iraq had nothing to do with 9/11.
- Bush gives a prime time speech declaring, "Were makin' no progress" in Iraq.
- Bush has a prime time press conference and responds lucidly and honestly to all questions.
- Bush signs legislation reinstating habeas corpus.
- Bush enlists in the armed forces, goes to boot camp, learns how to handle firearms, and shoots Cheney in the face.
- Bush resigns.
- Cheney resigns.
- Gonzo resigns.
- Eating anything you want is healthy.
posted by GottaLaff @ 5:48 PM
13 comments
13 Comments:
Add your own. The list is endless.
Well done Gottalaff...good stuff
Thanks Cliffy. It was cathartic.
But I need a bath after concentrating so long exclusively on Repukes.
Stephen Harper decides to increase spending on Social programs.
My city decides to open a new elementary school in my neighborhood, allowing my children to walk home instead of the hour long bus ride they currently take.
Jenna Bush decides never to drink again and dumps the loser.
The New Democrats win power in Canada.
The war ends, and peace breaks out across the world.
I would have found time to go to the liquor store and buy tequila.
Laffy stops making penis jokes.
Actually, scratch that last one. That would make my life miserable.
Chocolate is discovered to make you live to a hundred.
Same with tequila.
Noah doesn't leave a comment on this blog because none of this is hilarious at all. Or fun. None of it. Boo hoo.
Noahnoah,
I agree. I must stop these serious posts and lighten up. I'm bringing the entire site down.
Sincerely,
GottaLaff
Yes, Gottalaff, as the Snowman said to Mitt Romney, "Lighten Up Slightly."
Noahnoah,
I know that Snowman. He often sends me material.
He used to write for Steven Wright.
However, I understand he's going through a meltdown and had to be institutionalized.
Think good thoughts.
Thank you for the joke, Laffy.
You are more than welcome, Kirsten. It's the least I could do.
And to close out Opposite Day... Karl Rove wins 'Dancing With The Stars'!
Actually, Boehner's name should be pronounced "Beener." In German, the second vowel is prominent. Like "Frankenstein." We pronounce it Frank-en-styn.
His name is actually pronounced as it would be in Yiddish:
Putz.
Post a Comment
<< Home