Friday, July 20, 2007

Once You Join The GOP, You Can Never Leave The Family

This is just spooky. As you may or may not know, the Kansas GOP, much like the national party but even worse, has been melting down. Their former state party chair is now the lieutenant governor under Democratic Governor Kathleen Sebelius. The AG is also a Republican-turned-Democrat who ousted a crazy Republican from that job. And the list goes on and on.

So now you have to sign a loyalty pledge, like you're in one of the Five Families or Stalin's Communist Party. I know, you're not surprised. The GOP is nothing but a clinically paranoid cult these days, so what else could one expect.

Here is your loyalty oath friends:

I, _______________, promise never to abandon my present Republican Party affiliation for the purpose of political gain. The Republican Party, both nationally and domestically, was founded on sound and principled ideals, that include but are not limited to, personal liberty, individual freedom, responsive and citizen-based Government, life-affirming values, economic growth, strong and cutting edge military, low taxes and a mutual respect for fellow Republicans. Because of that, I will, at no point in my political or personal future, find cause to transfer my Party loyalty to any other affiliated organization.

I will not, at any future moment, become a registered Democrat for the purpose of seeking any political office. Additionally, I will not change my Party affiliation to that of any peripheral political party, such as the Reform Party, the Green Party or the Libertarian Party. Such a move would be not only opportunistic, it would be an unjustified trampling of everything that I previously claimed to stand for.

I care far too deeply about the previously espoused Republican ideals as well as the thousands of hard-working Republican citizens all over the State of Kansas to ever consider changing my political Party affiliation. I look forward to a life of citizen-serving, Republican political involvement. I thank the Kansas Republican Party, including all of the registered Kansas Republicans, for their years of service, good will and friendship.

I solemnly pledge to always be a Republican, no matter what promises are made by external forces seeking only to undermine the Republican values I stand for. I can have reasonable disagreement with members of the Republican Party; however, at no point will ‘Party switching’ or quitting of the Party be tolerable.


X __________________________________

(h/t Senate Guru and found at Blue Tide Rising)


At 8:58 AM, Blogger Paddy said...

I want to know what they say the "penalties" for not doing it are. Bunch of fuckers.

At 10:01 AM, Blogger Ashen Shard said...

I doubt there are any penalties ... looks to be a knee jerk reaction to a problem of their own making they don't know how to handle or solve.

At 10:06 AM, Anonymous Georgette Orwell said...

It's a spoof, right?

My favorite part is stressing that personal liberty and individual freedom are so important that one can prove s/he supports them only by giving them up. I'm going to go bang my head against the wall (some more) for a while.

At 10:53 AM, Blogger ohdave said...

That is insane!!!!!

Are you kidding me?

At 11:01 AM, Blogger Cliff Schecter said...

I wish this were a spoof. It is not however. This is your modern Republican Party....

At 12:15 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

What, no marriage purity clause? :-)

At 1:11 PM, Blogger BigAssBelle said...

or . . . or else?? or WHAT?? good grief! are they going to call in the enforcers for straying sheep?

At 2:52 PM, Blogger Kirsten said...

So, if Georgie Porgie walks off a cliff, will all those who sign do as he does? Please tell me that they would. I can start planning how to get that to happen.

At 11:12 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Any violation to this oath will be monitered and reported by the children and neihbor's children of those who sign.

Kansas provides sanctuary for the Phelps clan. What can one expect?

Cliff - keep slugging. You da man!

Please do a piece on why there is no footage of a plane hitting the pentagon despite the building being draped in securuty cameras.

With respect and kindness,

At 11:23 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'm a proud Democrat from Kansas and we love our AG Paul Morrison, and our Dem gov. Kathleen Sebelius!

Yes, the Kansas GOP is in meltdown mode, but believe me, the Phelps family are nut jobs that no one likes (except for other nut jobs). It is Fred Phelps and his misguided family doing all the scummy things that get in the press. As far as I know, they have no other supporters. Last time I checked, we still have freedom of speech in Kansas whether we like the horrid bile they spout or not.

At 1:39 PM, Anonymous Joshua Norton said...

Last time I checked, we still have freedom of speech in Kansas whether we like the horrid bile they spout or not.

Last time I checked, playing the "free speech" card wasn't an automatic absolution from its consequences. If that were true, Alexander Hamilton would have died in his bed at a ripe old age.

At 1:42 PM, Blogger egalia said...

Republicans can't even be faithful in their marriages, why should they be required to commit to a dying party?

At 2:24 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

This is a puzzling article. Please explain the background: who or what organization, exactly, is suggesting this pledge, and with what authority?

I like the 'personal liberties' part. I can look forward to Republican advances on the areas of freedom to choose a marriage partner or recreational drug of my choice.

At 2:53 PM, Blogger Mustang Bobby said...

Wow, that's a lot of verbiage. They could have trimmed it down to something like this:

I swear: I will be faithful and obedient to Adolf Hitler, Führer of the German Reich and people, to observe the law, and to conscientiously fulfill my official duties, so help me God.

All you have to do is put in "Dick Cheney" where it says "Adolf Hitler" and "Republican Party" where it says "German Reich" and you're good to go.

At 2:56 PM, Blogger Robert said...

I kind of like it. Folk that took this long to realize what a nightmare the Republican party is, are not folk I want in charge. Let them stay Republicans The top of the backwash is not what I want.

At 4:17 PM, Anonymous Dave E. said...

"This is just spooky."

No, it's complete nonsense, and you all fell for it hook, line, and sinker.

The origin of this pledge appears to be a Kansas Republican who posted it on his blog. It has since been twisted by other bloggers into an official Kansas GOP pledge and it's not. It's one blogger's idea and if you read the comments at that link, plenty of Republicans do not agree with him. For the record, I think it's a bad idea also.

You might want to rethink your trusted sources of information.

At 5:34 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Dave: It was written by a prominent Kansas Republican, and not as a joke or a parody. Don't be shocked if it does become official.

At 7:24 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

It's official. The GOP is nothing but a cross between a political cult and organized crime. Better get out the RICO charges once the Democrats take back the White House!

At 10:21 PM, Anonymous Clyde said...

Why to I think they have force folks to sign 2 copies of this in blood, followed by having one copy burned to represent the "punishment" to be exacted for violating the pledge. Do they also wear robes and have a sacrifice to finish the cult ritual.


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