Saturday, August 11, 2007

Federal Judge Appointed by George Herbert Walker Bush in Colorado Was Too Drunk to Remember His $3,000 in Strip Club Charges While He Was Married

The Republican scandal for today is....ta daaaaaa.....

Court documents obtained by 9Wants to Know show Colorado's top federal judge was too drunk to remember how he spent more than $3,000 at a strip club in two consecutive days.

He also used an Internet dating service while he was married.

Judge Edward Nottingham is the chief federal judge in Colorado and he is held to the highest standards of personal and professional conduct.

Judge Nottingham recently presided over the insider trading trial of ex-Qwest Communications CEO Joseph Nacchio.
Tsk, tsk, tsk, He's a baa-aa-aaad boy.
The marriage ended after Jaeger [his wife] found credit card charges from a strip club in downtown Denver totaling more than $3,000 in two consecutive days.
He sure doesn't have very good judgment...for a judge.
Judge Nottingham testified, "I'm ashamed and mortified just telling you that is the Diamond Cabaret ... a topless establishment."

Asked how he could have spent so much money, Judge Nottingham testified he could not recall, explaining, "I had had a lot to drink … and I don't remember."
"I don't remember." He and Gonzo must hang out.
Judge Nottingham also testified about credit card charges for a Web site called

Jaeger testified that she originally thought it was a dating service.

"When I asked about the dating service he turned around in his chambers and he hit his computer and he told me all about the dating service," Jaeger said in court. "It was a porn site."
What?!! But he's a Republican! A Bush appointee! He'd never do anything so crass and unmarriagey as frequent a...PORN SITE! Okay, let's not be too hasty. I bet he has a reasonable explanation.
When asked in court about a $150 charge to, Judge Nottingham said, "I'm embarrassed to be even talking about this. I think you pay extra to get certain features, such as if you upload a picture or – I don't even recall."
Again with the "I don't recall." Gonzo, have you been coaching judges again? According to a legal analyst: a federal judge Nottingham can be removed from the bench only for high crimes, misdemeanors, treason or bribery.
He gets to keep his job. No wonder he didn't keep his wife, what with those pesky Family Values weighing on them and all. Them wacky Republicans, they just keep me in stitches!


At 9:32 PM, Blogger GottaLaff said...

I can hardly contain myself. This one was just too much fun.

At 11:52 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I can't reveal my sources, but I hear Nottingham begins his work day with the pledge of allegiance that includes '...with liberty and lap dances for all'.

At 12:44 AM, Blogger GottaLaff said...

I pledge allegiance to the skank....


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